I thought of one for Art.
The second half of Meat Loaf's "I'll Kill You If You Don't Come Back". The first part isn't at all, but the second part i think fits him
I can't find it on Youtube, but the lyrics are:
Somebody bless all the girls in the sand on the beach
They're dreamin' of boys and staying just out of reach
Bless all the cheerleaders down on the track
They're glistening like diamonds with sweat on their backs
Bless all the girls in the gangs on the street
They're looking for danger and they're holding their piece
Bless all the girls staying late after school
They're playing with fire and oh they're playing it cool
And bless all the shy girls who're learning to dance
They stare in the mirror and they conjure romance
Bless all the girls who are always alone
They kneel down in prayer and they wait up by the phone
Bless all the homecoming queens of the night
They're looking for magic in gymnasium lights
And bless all the girls who know what love is about
They try not to cry and then they try to put out
And bless all the homecoming queens of the night
They're looking for magic in gymnasium lights
And bless all the girls who know what love is about
They try not to cry and then they try to put out
Somebody bless all these girls that I never have met
But damn you and curse you after all that you've done
You're the one girl I'll never forget
You're the one girl I'll never forget
Somebody bless all these girls and everything that they do
But damn me and curse me for still needing you
And I'll kill you if you don't come back
I'll kill you if you don't come back (repeats out)
As for a theme tune/entrance music - I think if Art could plug an MP3 Player into a set of speakers and attach it to his clothing, so he can play it whenever he strikes his Dramatic Pose
- that music would have to be the opening shots of AC/DC's "For Those About to Rock (We Salute You)"
From 20 seconds in, till about 50 seconds worth.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMUgmU_Hsjc